Psy vs. Psy
Season 2
Episode 3
Air Date July 27, 2007
Written by Andy Berman
Directed by Mel Damski
Guests Lou Diamond Phillips
Bianca Kajlich
Previous episode "65 Million Years Off"
Next episode "Zero To Murder In Sixty Seconds"

We open with a flashback to Shawn and Henry in the vice principal's office. Henry asserts that Shawn didn't have permission to go on the field trip, but the vice principal shows him the signed permission slip. He even has three other signed permission slips to compare them to. Henry immediately tells him it's a forgery. The vice principal doubts a child Shawn's age could make such a good forgery, but Henry knows he can. Shawn, wisely silent till now, comments the supposed forgery really does look like the real signatures. This was a mistake: he gave himself away, and now even the vice principal knows he forged the permission slip.

In the present day, Shawn and Gus walk down the hall at the police precinct. They run into a handsome man who introduces himself as Special Agent Lars Ewing of the FTD (Federal Treasury Department). Ewing tells them he has to go to a meeting in Chief Vick's office. Shawn tells him that's the same meeting they're going to. They try to joke with Ewing, but he is utterly humorless, and walks off without them. On their way to Vick's office, Shawn spots a beautiful woman sitting in the lobby. He tells Gus to go on ahead while he chats up this woman. She introduces herself as Lindsay Leikin. Shawn shows off, saying he's the head psychic around here, and, spotting new calluses on her fingertips, tells her he has a strong vibe that she just recently has taken up the guitar. She seems impressed. Shawn tells her he also senses it's going to be a very, very good week for her, and he walks into the meeting. Chief Vick explains that the Treasury Department sent Ewing because he's tracking a money counterfeiter who makes a large number of bills at a time, and then launders the fakes through local businesses across the country -- most recently Santa Barbara's own Home Depot. Ewing tells Shawn and Gus to state their names for the record, and puts down a small device on the desk to record the meeting. Lassiter wants to know the details about this cool device, so Ewing explains it's not a recording device; it's a microphone that's attached to a Mildred. Mildred is not a device. She is a person, Ewing's stenographer. Shawn says he has a question for Special, and Special Agent Ewing asks Vick, who is this guy? She introduces him as a psychic whom she thought might be helpful. Ewing says he brought his own psychic, and then Lindsay Leikin walks into the meeting. Ewing tells them she's very good, and she almost nabbed the counterfeiter once before -- she must have missed him by only five minutes. Vick takes them all to the conference room so they can set the agents up with a temporary office space. Lindsay and Shawn linger behind, and she tells him she is going to have fun solving the case and proving he is a fake.

The next morning, Vick, the detectives, Shawn, and Gus are walking up to the Home Depot to meet the agents. She tells them to cooperate fully and not embarrass her on her own turf. Ewing and Lindsay are also walking up, and he tells her she breached protocol, meeting their 0630 meeting time outside the hotel. She tells him she'd gone to get coffee. Shawn overhears this exchange.

In the Home Depot, Ewing is really grilling the clerk who accepted the fake $100 bills. Shawn interrupts, saying he is bored, and that he and Gus are going to go off and investigate the way real psychics do. He is playing with a forklift when he spots Henry, who tells Shawn to come to his house; he has a project for him. Henry walks off, and Shawn notices the security cameras. He runs up to visit the security guard, a dimwitted fellow named Garrison, who tells him that another psychic from the government was already there. Shawn easily convinces Garrison to let him see the security tapes anyway. They see a man at the checkout counter, but the man is careful not to show his face to the camera. However, Shawn notices that he set his keys on the counter, and specifically notes the type of car key.

Down on the floor, the detectives and agents are still grilling the clerk, who doesn't have much helpful information. Lindsay gets a psychic vibe, and tells them that the culprit had a small scar on his jaw, and wore a stud diamond in his left ear. The clerk agrees. Lindsay looks smug. The detectives and agents walk off, leaving a bewildered Shawn behind.

At the house, Henry tells Shawn and Gus he wants them to help him install a wet bar. Shawn thinks wet bars are hopelessly out-of-date, and mocks his dad, saying it'll be perfect for those nights when Reggie Jackson and Dyan Cannon come over for Harvey Wallbangers. Henry tells him to get to work, and leaves. Gus is shocked when Shawn actually is ready to get to work. He determines that Shawn is out-of-sorts because Lindsay is a better psychic. Shawn snaps out of it, and they review what they have so far: the keys shown on the Home Depot footage were for a Nissan. Shawn tells Gus he already tipped Lassiter off about that, and the police found only one Nissan in the outdoor security footage that didn't check out -- it didn't have plates. Shawn and Gus determine the culprit must be constantly changing cars, and using cash every time he gets a new one. So, they run off to visit a high-end car dealership, but the detectives and agents are already there. Lindsay mocks Shawn for being too slow. While the agents are talking with a manager at the dealership, Shawn tells the detectives he is hurt that they don't keep him in the loop anymore. Juliet goes off on an increasingly dreamy tangent about how Ewing called to catch her up, probably from the hotel, probably just after his shower, or maybe a swim, dripping wet… Lassiter explains that the culprit came in, bought a Lamborghini for $47,000 in cash, and tried to return it the next day. Of course the dealer wouldn't just give him his money back, but bought the car back for a mere $26,000. Of course, the $47,000 he purchased the car with was counterfeit, and the $26,000 he got back was real, so the culprit has come out way ahead. Ewing comes over and tells them they're going to look in the safe at some of the bills that didn't get deposited. Shawn walks with Lindsay, telling her he would rather cooperate than compete. She rebuffs this offer, so he says maybe they should just date. She tells him she's seeing someone already, and yes, it's serious.

In the manager's office, Ewing shows them the fake $100s that the dealership still had. Ewing picks up one of the bills and shows them its flaws, but Shawn is more interested in the second $100 bill Ewing has left on the table. Gus explains to Shawn about color-shifting ink, which is only used in $100s. Shawn then memorizes the serial number of that $100 bill.

Back at the precinct, Shawn and Gus walk in to another meeting between the police and the agents, but they get a very cold reception, and determine that they aren't welcome at this meeting. They get up to leave, and Shawn lets it drop that not all the $100s at the dealership were fake. Ewing is offended, saying he examined all those bills himself. Shawn tells them the serial number of the one he saw at the dealership, then he and Gus stalk off before the police and feds have a chance to check out his story. Shawn knows they'll see he's right and call them back in, which they do. Shawn tells the gang the counterfeiter used real money because he had to -- he didn't quite have enough counterfeit bills to buy the Lamborghini. He tells them the counterfeiter will have to print more money, so if they find his little counterfeiting nest, they will find him.

At Psych headquarters, Shawn, wearing an apron and pot-holders, offers Gus a pineapple upside-down cake, which he baked for 19 hours in an Easy-Bake oven. Lindsay walks in, and concedes she was wrong about Shawn. Now she wants to work together. They sit down and try to combine their psychic vibes to determine the location of the counterfeiter's print shop. Lindsay tells them it's by a body of water, which Shawn dismisses as being a hackneyed psychic trick -- everything is near a body of water! So Lindsay also tells them she's getting something about a hotel, in French. Gus pipes up that he knows of a hotel on a private beach that caters to Eurpeans and has been under construction for the past year, which would provide noisy cover for a counterfeiter's print shop.

At the hotel, Juliet tells the desk clerk they are looking for a guest who pays in cash. He tells them there are a lot of European travelers who stay there, and the majority pay in cash. Shawn snoops around a little and figures the counterfeiter is probably staying in the south tower, so pretends to get a psychic vibe, and tells them they need to look in the south tower. He goes on to say he sees a messy room, and Lindsay, not to be outdone, says yes, she sees towels on the floor. Shawn, competing against Lindsay, tells the clerk they're looking for a guy who's refused maid service, and probably stays in one of the less desirable rooms, facing the parking lot. This has narrowed it down enough that the clerk can give them the room number and key.

In the room, they find a washer and dryer, which the counterfeiter is using to make the money feel more real after he has printed it. Shawn notices the empty wrapper for a ream of linen paper, hidden in the closet. Lindsay claims she has a vibe that he printed about $50,000, which should last him a while. Shawn says no, he's getting a vibe that the culprit printed a lot more -- like $500,000, which would last more than just a while -- maybe a whole lifetime. Lindsay seems flustered, and claims her psychic sense insists he only printed $50,000. Shawn pretends his hand has been possessed, and lets it lead him to the closet, where he pulls out the empty wrapper of a 500-sheet ream. They also notice a seal on the desk. It's not a treasury seal -- it's a passport seal. This guy is obviously on the run, and they better catch him now, or they never will.

The whole gang walks out of the hotel, talking about how they've notified all the proper authorities to be on the lookout for a guy who matches the description Lindsay gave them. Lindsay hangs back to tell Shawn she's sorry, and he was right -- they really do make a good team. Shawn shakes her hand and lets her walk off without making a move. He tells Gus to wait for it. She turns back and tells him maybe they could get together now and keep working on the case (wink, wink). Shawn agrees, but where could they go at this late hour? Lindsay tells him to meet her at her hotel room at 2200 hours. He agrees, and as she walks off, he asks Gus in a whisper what time is 2200 hours? Gus stalks off.

In the hotel room, Lindsay is putting the moves on Shawn, but he reminds her that she is seeing someone already. She tells him she recently had a change of heart. Shawn perks up, and one thing leads to another… But Shawn wakes up alone in her bed the next morning. On the phone, he tells Gus she tricked him so she could take all the credit herself. He rifles around looking for clues, and tells Gus to come pick him up, and then gets a call-waiting beep from Lassiter.

The whole gang is assembled at a crime scene. They have found their counterfeiter, but he has been shot to death. Shawn observes that he does, in fact, have a small scar on his jaw and a stud diamond in his left ear. Lindsay bends down to get some vibes from the corpse, and she touches him. Lassiter is shocked -- you don't touch a body until the crime scene investigators have collected the evidence! Chief Vick isn't too concerned though -- it's obvious they got their man. She congratulations the agents on solving the case. Ewing says they don't need congratulations just for doing their job, but, looking at Juliet, says that a small hug wouldn't hurt. Vick steers the smitten Juliet away. Ewing calls after them, just an itty-bitty one? Shawn confronts Lindsay about her using him, but she doesn't speak. Shawn says at least he was right about one thing -- that it would be a good week for Lindsay.

At the house, Henry eats one of the Easy-Bake pineapple upside-down cakes, but spits it out, saying something is definitely wrong with this cake! Shawn's depressed because Lindsay beat him and solved the case herself. Henry tells Shawn he thinks he should just quit, because that's what Shawn always does. He goes on to say that Shawn doesn't have to prove anything, and he accepts him the way he is. This freaks Shawn out more than any lecture Henry could have given him.

Walking on the beach with Gus, Shawn is ranting about how awful the upside-down cakes taste, and he's upset because he paid $300 on eBay for the Easy-Bake oven. Gus points out that the cakes aren't what's upsetting Shawn. Shawn confesses he's really upset that Lindsay showed them up. Gus agrees, saying he thought Shawn had her at the hotel, when he surprised her with the information about just how much money the counterfeiter had been printing up. Shawn has a light-bulb moment, and they run off to the hotel where the agents were staying. They ask Mildred to read back Ewing and Leikin's discussion about Leikin breaking protocol and not making their 0630 meeting. Shawn and Gus are putting it all together now and offer Mildred a ride to the airport, where they are going anyway to confront Lindsay Leikin and really solve the case. Gus hands Mildred a note and asks her to read it aloud. She says "shotgun." Shawn has to ride in the back.

They arrive at the airport just as the detectives and agents are saying goodbye. Ewing asks Juliet if she has a MySpace page or something. Shawn runs up just as Lindsay is getting on the plane. Shawn tells everyone that there was no way Lindsay could have known about the counterfeiter's scar and earring unless she'd see him before. Then he says that day Lindsay was late meeting Ewing, she was having coffee -- far away from their hotel -- in Goleta, on the same day that the Lamborghini had been spotted in Goleta. He reveals that Lindsay actually did nab the counterfeiter that time, but instead of getting him arrested, she fell in love with him and decided they should join forces and make a lot of money. He says she blew it when she showed her surprise at the passport seal and the evidence that he'd printed way more than their planned $50,000. So she arranged to meet him at the warehouse, struggled with him, and shot him dead. Then the next morning when she touched the body, supposedly trying to get vibes from him, she was actually deliberately contaminating the crime scene, to cover up the forensic evidence she'd left the night before when she killed him. Lindsay tries to deny everything, but Shawn carries on, saying the only remaining issue is the location of the rest of the counterfeit money. Then he pretends to be psychically possessed again, and kicks over Lindsay's suitcase. Ewing opens it up and finds it chock full of counterfeit money. Lindsay, defeated, tells Shawn he was wrong about one thing -- when she slept with him, it was actually because she really liked him. Shawn acts embarrassed that she revealed their tryst to his coworkers, and further accuses her of giving real psychics like him a bad name. Lindsay grabs Shawn and holds a gun to his head, saying she's taking her hostage and taking the plane, but Mildred rolls her suitcase into Lindsay's shins, and Ewing takes her down in the confusion. Juliet looks like she might be a little jealous that Ewing is pinning Lindsay to the ground. He tells Juliet this isn't how it looks.

Back at the station, Chief Vick tells Juliet to wrap up her paperwork, and they'll get Lindsay on her way to Washington. Then a shirtless Ewing walks up to Juliet in slow motion, showing off his manly physique. She snaps out of it, but he's still shirtless -- Lassiter spilled coffee on him. But luckily, he always keeps a spare government-issue white shirt that folds up to the size of a wallet in his pocket. He walks off, and Juliet exhales sharply, craning her neck to watch him go.

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